With Love, Meghan. Meghan, Duchess of Sussex in episode 108 of With Love, Meghan. Cr. Jake Rosenberg/Netflix © 2025
When With Love, Meghan first dropped on Netflix, I read a lot of outrage and pearl-clutching comments about Meghan, Duchess of Sussex. Why isn’t she filming the series in her real kitchen? She’s unrelatable! No one’s going to be able to understand her life! Why is she even making this show?!
With so many people saying so much stuff about Sussex’s new show, I watched it for myself. And guess what?
It wasn’t bad.
It was enjoyable.
As a constant viewer of lifestyle television, I saw nothing strange, uppity, or out of the norm on With Love, Meghan. If a white woman hosted this, duchess or not, no one would be talking about it. You can guess the real reason for the outrage.
While watching With Love, Meghan and reflecting on her life experiences so far, I came away with several messages of hope and resilience. These lessons are applicable to anyone, regardless of their station in life.
- Faltering doesn’t mean failure or that you’re less worthy
- People will not understand you or might even be threatened by you; that’s okay
- The people who truly love you and believe in you will stick around and build you up
- You can always come out on top if you believe in yourself
Faltering doesn’t mean failure or that you’re less worthy
Suppose you followed Sussex’s time as part of the Firm, i.e., the working members of the royal family and their handlers. In that case, you’ve probably heard a lot about the trouble she faced as the first Black royal in British royalty in several hundred years. Sussex faced excruciating racism within and outside the Royal Family, as relayed by Prince Harry in his and Sussex’s 2021 sit-down with Oprah Winfrey.
Between weirdness with some of the royal family members and the press ripping Sussex up for any move, Harry said that his wife eventually became depressed and suicidal. Fearing that the press would lead to his wife’s death, similar to the death of his mother, Princess Diana, Harry decided to leave the Firm altogether and take his family away from the spotlight.
We have all felt some level of depression in our lives. For some of us, it might be general, situation-based blues. For others, it could be clinical or worse. No matter what level of sadness and depression you feel, don’t guilt yourself over your feelings.
A clinical psychologist can say it better than I could, so I turned to Psychology Today‘s Margaret Wehrenherg Psy.D., who wrote how depression isn’t your fault.
“Believe that depression is a medical condition (not your fault or a sign of your weakness) in which you have thoughts and feelings that are not true,” Wehrenherg wrote. “Just because you don’t see positives in your life does not mean there are no positives. Not every belief you have is true. Try believing that depression clouds your vision of who you are and what you are worth and it impairs your ability to see what is good about you.”
People will not understand you or might even be threatened by you; that’s okay
If Sussex was a white woman who married a prince, left the Firm, and restarted her career as a lifestyle guru, the (mostly) white people up in arms would love the show and hail her as a woman who survived intense trials to come out on top. She would have always been America’s Duchess, and a show would have only increased her popularity. No one would be calling her uppity or hard to connect with.
The only reason Sussex is hard to connect with is because she’s part Black. For way too many people, a Black royal is impossible to conceive since the media has entrenched the idea of white royalty in our collective consciousness.
Think about the princesses you’ve seen on television and in film. Why is it that Brandy’s Cinderella is still one of the most celebrated versions of the story? Why is it that Princess Tiana has a devoted fanbase? It’s because Black princesses, and princesses of color in general, are extremely rare in pop culture. Anecdotally, look at how the Disney Princess line has developed over the years. You’ll see how the company did its best to diversify the line with any woman of color they happened to feature in a film because Disney’s lineup of POC princesses is almost nonexistent.
Even more annoying is how some Black people are trying to police her Blackness. Some threaders have been asserting the false notion that she doesn’t claim her Blackness or that she’s never advocated for Black issues. Neither of which is true, but, as far as I can see, because she doesn’t fit into the stereotypical idea of a Black woman, she’s somehow not Black enough. This ridiculous argument helps no one except those who gain their power from stuffing Blackness into a box. If there’s no monolith for Blackness, then perhaps we as a people should actually embrace that.
We can advocate for more examples of different Black experiences, including the royal experience. We can also advocate for more examples of soft living featuring women of color. But as far as our personal experiences go, we can look at how Sussex is handling the criticism as inspiration for how we can handle tough moments in our lives.
I’m glad to see Sussex has seemingly learned from her prior battles with mental health because, with the release of her show, she has clearly put up boundaries with the part of the public who want to see her fall. She has blocked comments from her Instagram posts. Sussex rarely engages with what she sees online, and if she does, she does so in a classy way that immediately shuts down criticism, such as when she appeared in a reel with Gwyneth Paltrow to squash rumors of a lifestyle guru beef. She is laser-focused on what brings her joy, which includes her family, her brand, and her commitment to living by her morals.
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It’s tough when people don’t understand you, but that’s how life is sometimes. Not everyone is going to understand us, and frankly, some people shouldn’t—those people shouldn’t be in our lives. Don’t resort to people-pleasing. Instead, focus on what brings you joy and makes you feel like your best self.
The people who truly love you and believe in you will stick around and build you up
No matter who tries to bring you down, their opinions don’t matter. What matters is what the people who uplift you think.
Throughout Sussex’s tribulations, her mother and her husband were by her side, helping her along the way. We have seen how Harry moved Heaven and Earth to get her out of her toxic surroundings in the U.K. Also, even though her mother has been relatively quiet, she continually offers her daughter support and love. Sussex also has her close friends, such as makeup artist Daniel Martin, who stick up for her every chance they get.
When facing your issues in life, think about who has been in your corner. Those people, the ones who love you and will do anything for you, are the people who truly matter in your journey.
You can always come out on top if you believe in yourself
You can always come out on top with self-confidence, supportive family and friends, and a “See ya later, haters!” attitude. We see Sussex flourishing now, flourishing with her television show, which has been greenlit for a second season, a sold-out lifestyle brand, and emotional savviness to clap back at the folks who constantly reveal how she lives in their heads rent-free.
I’m not saying it’s easy, but remembering that you’re valid, regardless of what people say or think about you, is key to always putting yourself first. No matter what, you are worthy, and you matter.
What have you learned from Sussex’s life and career? How will you incorporate these lessons into your life? Let me know below or on Facebook, Instagram, Threads, and BlueSky!